Our local newspaper has a daily advice column, of the ” dear Abby” variety. Its kind of hit and miss as far as how often I read it, but occasionally its good reading. It certainly brings to life the the expression ” truth is stranger than fiction”. There are some seriously messed up people!
One day last week this girl writes in and ( paraphrased) writes that she has a wonderful relationship with her boyfriend but for one thing: she fears she can’t do anything right–for example: if she puts the dishes in the dishwasher, he will re arrange them. if she parks her bike at the park, he will straighten it out. if she folds the clothes, he will refold them. She cited a few more examples about how he must think she is a dope because he “fixes” everything she does. The columnist responded and nailed it right on the head: ” dont think this is about you honey, its about him”. She deduced that he probably has mild form of OCD-ish tendencies and for HIS world to be right, the dishes have to be straight in the dishwasher and that bike needed to be a certain way in the bike rack and his undies have to be folded just so.
I know this guy: Its me ( in female form). I have come to understand while I am not over the top OCD, I certainly have to have a certain amount of order in my life for me to be comfortable. I dont wash my hands 100 times day, and I don’t need to straighten the fringe on the area rugs all day long or shut a door 100 times to be sure its closed, but if certain things aren’t right, my world is rocked off its axis until those things are corrected.
I keep my closet organized. Its all separated by item and color. all my golf shirts are arranged ROYGBIV, as are Mr Chicks by my hand. All the pants hang a certain way and every drawer is tidy. Black sox here, white sox there. Everything needs to have a place..and everything needs to be IN that place. If its not, then I ruminate over it way too much until I can fix it. I hate clutter…and I have too much of it already.
Mr Chick is not this way, tho to some extent he will entertain my obsessions and support my efforts to keep my world straight. He lets me keep his shirts in order and he makes a modest attempt to keep his side of the closet tidy.
I know I am ridiculous.
My golf bag is just as ridiculous. If Mr chick hands me golf balls he finds and wants to stick it in my bag..and they AREN’T a titleist pro-v 1, I can’t hardly stand them to be IN my bag and cant wait until the round is over and I can get them out. I dont like stuff in my bag that I dont WANT in it. I dont like his fleece, or his water bottle or his rain gear in my bag either. I need a good head slap probably.
My concession to this is the garage. If it were up to me that garage would be operating room clean, and well organized. Sadly, its Mr Chick’s space and its a rather messy and disorganized space. When we replaced all the dilapidated cabinetry a couple of years ago, I encouraged organization, but it didn’t go very well. To this day, the drawers are a jumbled mess of junk and if we want something and can’t find it, we will more often than not abandon the search and go and buy it. ( then stumble upon it later) The cabinets have modest organization, but nothing special. I keep resisting the urge to start cleaning it…and I may give in to the urge and do it.
Recently my world was rocked again with a remodel in the bathroom. For 6 weeks we have had all of our bathroom and master closet stuff in totes in the bedroom and guest rooms. We have been bathing in the guest room and all of my clothes have been piled on the guest bed. I find myself tidying up OTHER areas of the house because I can’t tidy up the mess upstairs. It makes everything dusty ( even with the draping) and currently its all cluttered and awry. I made one step back to normalcy when the closet was completed: I had my clothes back in place in record time!
The pharmacy is a reflection of my need for order. I have things in certain places for a reason and they have to be there. If my special spatula is missing, I am internally upset. I dont care if the rx’s are in complete alphabetical order, but I do like them to be exactly equidistant on the shelves ( left to right) so I can see them best. the tape has to be straight and the stapler has to be next to the tape.
I am grateful for a staff who understands me.
I am ridiculous…but its who I am.