The Pharmacy Chick

Flying the coup in retail

Summer Nudity…aka look in the mirror please!

Filed under: Uncategorized — pharmacychick at 10:43 am on Monday, July 11, 2011

One of the disadvantages (and there are many) of living in a climate where summer is all to brief and the coldest season stays too long is that many people take too little thought into what they dress themselves in during the hot days of summer. Perhaps its because they own so few summer clothes and dont desire to invest much cash into clothing they aren’t going to wear much.  Perhaps the long winter has wilted their brains and they have become stupid. Im no prude, but I have some sense of style.  I know I have written about this before so its time to launch the 2011 version of WHAT NOT TO WEAR during the summer:

1.  No matter what culture, a striped shirt and a plaid pair of shorts with black socks and loafers will look stupid..seriously stupid…

2.  Black is only slimming to a point.  If you are 250 lbs and are wearing black spandex leggings….you are not looking slimmer….ever.

3.  Step away from the tube tops..its never that hot out. .

4. Bathing suits belong in two places….the beach and poolside.  They do not belong at the pharmacy counter.  Yes I know you have a a hot body and my intern is foaming at the mouth, but I need him to pay attention to the counting tray, not YOUR belly button ring.

5. Same lady every year…. 70 ish.. white shorts and full length nylons.  WTF?

6.  Good rule of thumb. if you are a man ( or a member of the male species), your shirt should always be longer than your belly…and likewise, if you are a girl, your shorts should be longer than your butt.

7. Second good rule of thumb.  Nobody wants to see your underwear…and this applies to girls in thongs and boys in boxers.  tuck them in.

8. Do not use John Daly as a guide on how to dress on the golf course.  He is a drunk doofus and dresses like one.

9. Shoes …sandles…flip flops…I dont care…but do not walk my aisles in bare feet…Have you ever heard of broken glass?  Yea we get that now and then so dont come to me with your dirty and bloody feet looking for help. ( yes its actually happened…more than once)

10.  White clothes do a lousy job of hiding your polkadot underwear.  Im just sayin….

And lastly…put your sunscreen on.  That “burned look” isn’t fashionable anymore either, unless you WANT to be on the cover of Skin Cancer Monthly Magazine.

Peace!

9 Comments »

Comment by Jon

July 11, 2011 @ 11:39 am

It’s all good advice, especially #6.

Comment by MMM

July 11, 2011 @ 12:08 pm

LOVE IT! #6 should be on a billboard somewhere…..yea 6 is my favorite also 🙂

Comment by C

July 11, 2011 @ 2:21 pm

Sign at pharmacy window

You are being photographed, each and every one of you, smile! X Pharmacy reserves the right to publish that photo on the internet-have a nice day!

Comment by JS

July 11, 2011 @ 5:17 pm

Agreed! I am shocked with what I have seen lately! Just a few of my own!

I kind of support the NO SHOES, NO SHIRT, NO SERVICE!

If you wear said shorts or tank tops, ladies; please shave your arms and legs!

Also, put your cap on the correct way, they backwards look—so last year!

And if you have children, dress them age appropriate. You three your old in short shorts and a tube top too try to look like their teenage friends or family is not cute or funny. If your the Mom (parent) than exercise your parental authority.

Comment by Texas Pharmacy Chica

July 11, 2011 @ 5:45 pm

Kinda in reverse down here:

The temperature drops below 40 and people pull out the winter coat they bought for a ski trip in 1989 and have used for approximately 3 days a year since then.

In Texas only: Cowboy hats match anything, including swim shorts.hahahah

Comment by Tee

July 12, 2011 @ 4:51 pm

Amen.

Amen, Amen, Amen.

And let me add an Amen!

Comment by LibraryGryffon

July 13, 2011 @ 10:41 am

I’d really like to push the sunscreen. Never mind that lobster red isn’t usually considered fashionable, nor are the pre-cancerous moles that come soon afterwards.

Many years ago I interviewed with a bank. The interviewer was in her 30s and obviously used sunblock religiously on her face. Her chest? Not so much, and she equally obviously *loved* sunbathing. She was wearing a V-neck dress, not particularly low cut, and I couldn’t stop staring at the tanned, spotted leather below her neck that she called skin. I should probably add that I’m a definitely hetero girl, so I’m not normally that interested in someone’s decolletage!

Comment by Mimi

July 15, 2011 @ 11:08 am

Haha yessss this post is awesome! I have the same problem where i live not enough sunny days. Theres also the unwashed sweaty white tanks by both men and women. Really really lowcut shirts. Sweaty money. Girls wearing a slightly long shirt as a dress. Lol

Comment by Jessie

July 18, 2011 @ 7:32 am

The only one I understand is the older women with pantyhose. My late Mom always wore support hose – even with shorts, as she had vericose veins and the support hose made her legs feel better.

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