Pharmacy Chick decided to do Mr Chick a favor and barbecue dinner. He was slaving away digging up a root from a bush we chopped down a few weeks ago. AND since the Chick family doesn’t have a kitchen at the moment due to a major renovation (think sub floors and wall studs all that remain), we have moved into the garage and cook outdoors. I thought I should share my recipe! so, here it is.
Buy 2 packages of chicken and some fancy schmancy marinade, and marinade for 30 minutes. Leave skin on because the barbecue book you ‘borrowed’ while working says it tastes better with skin on. Figure now that you are the barbecue queen. Gently season chicken with secret stuff.
Start Barbecue…flame goes out. Start barbecue again… and again. Flame finally stays lit.
Carefully position chicken on heated BBQ, Turn temp to what appears to be LOW and begin cooking.
FIRE! Grab water bottle and spray BBQ. Remember that water doesnt put out grease fire. SH!T.
Move chicken around to minimize fire. Put out another fire. Put out yet another fire. Turn temperature down, Flame goes out. Re light barbecue for 5th time.
Question the wisdom of barbecue book-Chicken is black on the outside and raw on inside and everything is on fire. Blame the skin.
Whine to Mr Chick about the condition of chicken. Mr Chick asks why the temp so high. Tell Mr Chick haughtily that if its turned down the flame goes out. Mr Chick gently shows PC that “low” is under the control handle and, in fact, she was turning OFF the barbecue every time she turned it “down”. Oh.
Realize that instead of “low”, chicken was cooking at a temperature someplace between Blast Furnace and Volcano.
Rename “Sesame Orange chicken” “Blackened unidentifiable meat” . Figure that the microwave can cook the inside of chicken.
Serve on paper plate. Sit up straight and pretend you intended it to look that way.